25 things about me, the long version

1. when i was a little girl i wanted desperately to be a mermaid. i would spend hours under the ocean hoping that if i somehow stayed underwater long enough some sort of magical transformation would take place. it never happened and it is still disappointing to me, even as an adult.

2. i look forward to being a mother. this is a new feeling and one that really surprises me. i looked at house the other day and it had a nursery off the master bedroom. i cried. i could see the crib.

3. i am amazed and thankful everyday that i found matthew. i never much believed in soul mates and thought that maybe one day i would find someone i would 'click' with enough to marry. but i was completely unprepared for this. i love him more than i can truly explain with words. we are connected in a way that is sometimes unreal to me. he is my person. the only one for me. he is my best friend, my lobster.

4. i am really good at my job. i love being the introduction to education for little people and i truly believe that kindergarten teachers have the most important job. i also love going to work everyday because i work with amazing people who im proud to call my friends.

5. the summer of '05 i traveled through Europe by myself. it is one of the things that i am most proud of in my life.

6. i lost my best friend three years ago and it still hurts everyday.

7. i love to laugh and i actively surround myself with fun people that don't take life too seriously. i do not however like the typical joke book kind of “jokes.” they are boring and hardly ever make me laugh. i heart situational comedy and wit.

8. i like holding hands. with matt, with my mom, with lilly catherine smith. i like the connection, it warms my heart.

9. the smell of smoke disgusts me and i can not be around it. i smoked for about five years and i am thoroughly disgusted with myself for it.

10. i am nice mix of parents: im outgoing and sociable like my mother, not to mention a carbon copy of her good looks. i am organized and nerdy like my dad and crave alone time more than most people i know.

11. i heart television more than id like to admit. i don't have cable so i rock the 3 and 1/2 channels with ghetto-fabulous rabbit ears. i like a handful of sitcoms. i LOVE jeopardy and watch it almost every night. i watch the news when it suits me. im a nightowl and really enjoy late night talk shows, conan is my favorite. when im near a tv with a million channels i watch the deadliest catch, music videos & movies. ooooh and i love TV on DVD: the wire, arrested development, six feet under, weeds.

12. mountains frighten me. i feel like im going to fall off the side every time im on one. drop me in the middle of the ocean and ill do okay, take me on a ski trip and i crumble.

13. i love basketball. i dont play, i just watch. but im serious about a game.

14. i'm seriously considering a tattoo. im going any day now...

15. when im in an awful mood only a few things can pull me out of my funk: reggae, loud reggae. going to the movies, solo. cleaning the house, dust cloths and everything. or a long drive in 5th gear, windows down.

16. i have an unnatural love for office supplies. anything from binders to paperclips and everything in between. i literally could spend hours in an office supply store.

17. my two favorite ways to fall asleep: matthew playing guitar on the edge of the bed or matthew playing with my hair.

18. sometimes i feel like a rockstar. i can't walk through the cafeteria without hearing my name a dozen times. or buy tampons at the pharmacy without seeing someone i know.

19. i dont believe in god. but i am coming to terms with others' beliefs. i like everything i know about jesus and think he would be disgusted by modern day churches, christians and religion. my personal religion is simple: be a good person. i go to sleep every night knowing that i live my life as a good person and that is all i need to know.

20. being a grown-up sometimes freaks me out. i still feel like i should be sitting at the kid table and i cant remember when or why i got promoted?

21. im not one of those girls whos been dreaming of their wedding day since tweendom, but since meeting the love of my life i have completely planned the wedding. i have a band, a date, a location, even a guest list...but no engagement ring.

22. i like to cook and bake. but wish i had a nicer kitchen because i might do it more often. music is a must in my cooking space, the food will taste better if singing and dancing were involved.

23. i am grossed out by olives, nervous about crossing streets and terrified of wolves. i am fearful that i will die from one of these three things.

24. i speak a little farsi, enough to get by in a DC taxi it turns out.

25. my favorite thing to do is dance to live reggae. it warms my soul.